I stand up next to a mountain...

I'm worried about Mick.

Voodoo Chile by Jimi Hendrix just came on the radio and Mick gave me a terrified look. His little face screwed up and he looked as if he was going to cry. Then he looked towards me, put his hands over his ears, extended his neck, lowered his chin and said “Lur-owwww”

(that’s a lur and then an owwww like “owww I just hurt myself” rather than an owwww like oboe, but I feel as if I made that perfectly clear – the lur and the owwww slurred together.

I’m trying to convey that he was saying the word loud without the –d sound on the end, just imagine the word loud without the –d sound on the end and you have the sound that he made, to indicate to me that the intro of Voodo Chile was too loud.)

It was more the look on his face that worried me. It was really serious as if he was trying to say “Dad, the power of this guitar is dangerous to your ears, please Dad, for your own protection, please cover them up,”

He kept taking his hands off his ears and then doing it again “Lur –owwww, Lur-owwww,”

The really worrying thing was that the radio was really quiet at the time. I would say it was at comfortable to talk over volume, as opposed to begin talking to your wife and then realise you are feeling really irritated with everything and your shoulders are rising up and your head is getting screwed up and then your wife says “Can we turn it down a bit David?” (if you are called David) and you say “Please do,” and it is a relief.

It certainly wasn’t at rocking out with a sharp knife in your hand and a chicken on a chopping board volume.

Elly never complained of anything being “Lur-owwwww, Lur-owwwww,” In fact, she used to get furious with me that it wasn’t loud enough.

I really hope I’m never in the room with Mick and then Norah Jones comes on the radio and he looks at me and says “nyyyyy, nyyyyy, nyyyyyy,”

(which would be the sound of the word “nice” without the “s” sound at the end.)

Because then my child would be the kind of person who likes Norah Jones.

Then again, all of this may be a little over the top, as I don’t like Jimi Hendrix either. In fact I detest Jimi Hendrix and having to listen to people who like him say “but Dave, he was a fucking geeeeeeeeenius – listen to THIS,” and then look at me and stare at me and get annoyed with me when after the intro I say “Yes, I am now bored of this excessively histrionic virtuoso guitar playing.”

Maybe “Lur-owwwwww Lur-owwwwww” doesn’t mean “Loud, Loud” – maybe it just means “Switch this shit off dad, I hate Hendrix, he sucks.”

Good old Mick.